Hi. Guess what? You've survived the Fall semester. And not only have you survived it, now you get a break full of lights and holidays and sweater weather. Pretty good stuff, I think. But before you burrow into your (softest, warmest, coziest) bed and hibernate for several weeks, I want to tell you something.
Me. The blog. Not me, Mary. Not me a person sitting at a computer trying to think of how to tell you this. Me, the blog, full of wisdom and authority. That me.
Use the break to write.
Sounds simple, right? And you're probably already planning to do this, but listen. Things will get in the way. You'll get into a fight with your sister over French toast. You'll lose the keys to your car and lock yourself out of your house. You'll get a terrible haircut and feel compelled to hide your shame cuddled up in bed with a book or a video game or a movie.
So I'm suggesting a date. With yourself, with your writing. A time, a place, an amount of time or of words. And keep your date each day. Take that time for yourself, even if it means writing something like: This is stupid. I can't think of anything to write - why is that blog so bossy! Why am I even listening to a blog? What am I doing with my life? How can I make amends for the French toast thing... Right? Because eventually you'll get somewhere good. Somewhere necessary, at least. Such is the nature of writing. I don't know about you, but as a blog, I rarely know where I'm going until I get there. I mean, there might be a vague goal shimmering somewhere off in the distance, but it isn't always there, and sometimes I don't even make it there anyway. I end up someplace else, someplace unintended and inconceivable before I get there- there's something kind of magical about that, you know?
So write. Each day. Think of it as self care. Or if you hate that, think of it as talent care. Life care. Care care.
Okay, I've made my point as forcefully as I am able. Now I'm giving you some writing prompts. Feel free to use them on those days you sit down and find yourself with a b-l-a-n-k page and a b-l-a-n-k mind. Remember you can always go back and revise during those times as well.
Winter writing prompts:
1) Things get messy with the French toast
2) A poem is a machine
3) Your character forgets everything s/he wanted
4) Your character got one thing wrong
5) Just confess - everyone knows you did it
6) A story travels through time
7) Everything is a conversation
8) How to start a bad habit
9) There are infinite ways to be born
10) Research the background of a product you use every day or can't live without
There are more. You can look them up online, there are books of prompts, and you can write prompts for each other. Get together and read your stuff. Invite Mary - I understand she loves readings.
The blog is your trusty blog, home to the musings of past, present, and (possibly?) future MFA students in FAU's Creative Writing Program. Follow us on Facebook. Contact us at mfa@fau.edu.
Wednesday, December 10, 2014
Monday, November 24, 2014
Double-blind
Writers
have a unique power that if not used for good can have everlasting
consequences. Right now I have you hooked; you keep reading because you want me
to tell you what I have to say. This
is the power I speak of. You as the reader trust me. You've never met me. I
could be an escaped goldfish from a mad scientist’s lab, but you think I’m a
good person. You believe I have something important I need to say. You believe
I won’t lead you astray. Readers go into a story with blind trust, the instinct
to believe what the narrator is saying. This is a noble instinct. Something
poetic could be said about the inherent good in people as seen by their
immediate need to believe or trust in something or someone they’ve never met.
Look at politics. We want to believe politicians all the time. Some of us do.
When
a reader encounters an unreliable narrator, there is a fascination with being
beguiled or lead to believe a very limited point of view. Perhaps right now you
think of an unreliable narrator as a criminal or evil person. However, the
truth is that everyone thinks they are the good guys despite what they do or
say. Hitler thought he was doing everyone a favor. He was deluded and evil in
his methodology and thinking, but the point is that unreliable narrators
usually think they are on the right side of history. They honestly believe they
are correct. This is what makes them so good at deceiving; they believe, so we
then believe. We now have the perfect recipe for crafting an unreliable
narrator: the trust of the reader and the narrator’s desire to be right.
Stephen King writes that “the trust of the innocent is the liar’s most useful
tool.” In this case, the writer creating the narrator is the liar and the innocent
is the reader. This is also a limited view of what an unreliable narrator is,
so let’s broaden the definition.
One
of the most attractive qualities about the use of an unreliable narrator is
that they are shape shifters. They come in many different forms. Imagine the
Harry Potter novels rewritten through the point of view of a Death Eater or The
Catcher in the Rye as told by Holden’s parents. We would see Harry as a
vile creature who keeps trying to thwart Voldemort’s plan to bring harmony to
the wizarding world, and Holden would just be a whiney child who hates life.
Point of view is one of the most important parts of the story. The point of
view shapes the lens through which we see the world of the story.
So,
should a child be considered an unreliable narrator? Yes, because they have a
limited worldview. Holden Caulfield is considered unreliable because he
believes the world is out to get him and he hates everyone. In the novel Room
by Emma Donoghue, the narrator is a five year-old named Jack who has been
locked in one room with his mother for his entire life. His unreliability is
unintentional, but he is unreliable nonetheless. Lolita is perhaps the
most famous example and uses an unreliable narrator that tries to cloud the
immoral and justify his actions. In Gone Girl the reader encounters two
conflicting points of view without knowing which to believe. When the
trustworthy perspective is eventually revealed, we can still see how the
unreliable character feels his or her actions are completely justified. There
are also instances of perception being altered by drugs and alcohol. These
narrators aren’t intentionally unreliable, but they don’t know better because
they are inebriated. This raises a larger question: can any narrator—particularly
a first person narrator—be reliable?
Now,
you have journeyed with me for almost 700 words and you want to trust what I’ve
just told you. Could I have made everything up because I hit a deadline and
needed something to write? Could I have copied everything I needed from
Wikipedia and passed it along as my own? The truth is, you can’t know. But you
want to believe me because why would a narrator lie to you?
Scott Rachesky is a first year MFA fiction candidate at FAU.
Aside from singing Carmina Burana in
community choir, being a photographer, solving imaginary murders, and raising Unipegs, he enjoys to write…go
figure. His writerly influences include Chuck Palahniuk, Jennifer Egan, Lori
Moore, and Joseph Heller. Some people have described his writing style as similar
to F. Scott Fitzgerald, but he doesn’t believe those people and thinks they
only make the connection because of the shared name of Scott.
Monday, November 17, 2014
Rejected!
For me, the most striking moment during the "Writing and Publishing Your First Book" panel was when Julie Marie Wade talked about her Tupperware boxes of rejections. She said the acceptance letters filled a modest box she could keep on her desk, while the rejections were stacked from floor to ceiling in one of her closets.
I love that image.
Not because I love to think of Julie Marie Wade being rejected (I'm sure I don't have to tell you what a phenomenal writer she is), but because it makes real for me one of the most worrisome/mundane aspects of being a writer. Funny, isn't it? How much terror and despair are both intense and boring, a sharp sting and an unfocused, dazed stare. Rejections. Yes, I have a lot of them. Many, many more than acceptances.
Jaswinder Bolina said something that also stuck with me. He said you have to figure out what success means for you. That when you write to someone else's ideas of success, you betray yourself. And that can never actually be success.
And Jamie Poissant's comments about his manuscript and the rounds it had to make before finally being accepted encouraged me.
Basically, it was a wonderful evening and I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did. It left me thinking about my own work. My own feelings about this stuff.
Look, the thing is, I have these two manuscripts, right? One is a collection of mostly experimental short stories, and one is a hybrid text of poetry and art, and I've been working on them for five and two years respectively. In the meantime, I've also managed to rack up over six pages of Submittable rejections (each page has like 40 submissions). Okay, so eleven of those are acceptances, and something like 10 are listed as "in progress," but still. The vast majority (as vast as is the night sky) are denials.
Rejections.
And! Julie Marie Wade said she gets something like 200 rejections a year. Which, okay, so I'm only talking Submittable, which means I have other rejections/acceptances, but not that many. I need to up my game. Anyway.
These rejections are my virtual closet full of boxes containing the evidence that my work wasn't right for whichever publication I sent it to; that they, in fact, did not want it, and I will tell you this - it's hard not to make the jump to they, in fact, did not want me.
The thing is though - that voice that whispers to you that you're not good enough? That says each rejection is just more proof that you will never be a "real" (whatever that is) writer? That voice is bullshit. It is! It takes years to hone your craft. Our crafts. And we'll see each other struggle, succeed, and fail and fail and fail. It's our job as writers (and especially as a part of a writing community) to find joy for other's successes and sorrow for their failures. This will help us deal with our own rejections and successes. Because success is sweet, but it is a short-lived sweetness, lemme tell you. It's like Juicy Fruit Gum™.
So, listen. Your peers - their success and failures - they cannot diminish you. Or me. Or us. They can only make us better. Each piece, like each writer, its own interconnected ecosystem. I mean, and this is totally Donne, but. Well. Wait. It's worth a reminder. Here is John Donne:
No man is an island entire of itself; every man
MR Sheffield is an alumna of FAU's Creative Writing MFA program as well as the graduate advisor for English. Her work has been published or is forthcoming from Pank, The Florida Review, Fiction Southeast, and other publications. Email her (msheffi3@fau.edu) with all your advising questions.
I love that image.
Not because I love to think of Julie Marie Wade being rejected (I'm sure I don't have to tell you what a phenomenal writer she is), but because it makes real for me one of the most worrisome/mundane aspects of being a writer. Funny, isn't it? How much terror and despair are both intense and boring, a sharp sting and an unfocused, dazed stare. Rejections. Yes, I have a lot of them. Many, many more than acceptances.
Jaswinder Bolina said something that also stuck with me. He said you have to figure out what success means for you. That when you write to someone else's ideas of success, you betray yourself. And that can never actually be success.
And Jamie Poissant's comments about his manuscript and the rounds it had to make before finally being accepted encouraged me.
Basically, it was a wonderful evening and I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did. It left me thinking about my own work. My own feelings about this stuff.
Look, the thing is, I have these two manuscripts, right? One is a collection of mostly experimental short stories, and one is a hybrid text of poetry and art, and I've been working on them for five and two years respectively. In the meantime, I've also managed to rack up over six pages of Submittable rejections (each page has like 40 submissions). Okay, so eleven of those are acceptances, and something like 10 are listed as "in progress," but still. The vast majority (as vast as is the night sky) are denials.
Rejections.
And! Julie Marie Wade said she gets something like 200 rejections a year. Which, okay, so I'm only talking Submittable, which means I have other rejections/acceptances, but not that many. I need to up my game. Anyway.
These rejections are my virtual closet full of boxes containing the evidence that my work wasn't right for whichever publication I sent it to; that they, in fact, did not want it, and I will tell you this - it's hard not to make the jump to they, in fact, did not want me.
The thing is though - that voice that whispers to you that you're not good enough? That says each rejection is just more proof that you will never be a "real" (whatever that is) writer? That voice is bullshit. It is! It takes years to hone your craft. Our crafts. And we'll see each other struggle, succeed, and fail and fail and fail. It's our job as writers (and especially as a part of a writing community) to find joy for other's successes and sorrow for their failures. This will help us deal with our own rejections and successes. Because success is sweet, but it is a short-lived sweetness, lemme tell you. It's like Juicy Fruit Gum™.
So, listen. Your peers - their success and failures - they cannot diminish you. Or me. Or us. They can only make us better. Each piece, like each writer, its own interconnected ecosystem. I mean, and this is totally Donne, but. Well. Wait. It's worth a reminder. Here is John Donne:
No man is an island entire of itself; every man
is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
well as any manner of thy friends or of thine
own were; any man's death diminishes me,
because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.
Your friends' successes are your own. As are their failures. And that can make a closet full of rejection letters feel more like a wardrobe into a whole other world.
Your friends' successes are your own. As are their failures. And that can make a closet full of rejection letters feel more like a wardrobe into a whole other world.
MR Sheffield is an alumna of FAU's Creative Writing MFA program as well as the graduate advisor for English. Her work has been published or is forthcoming from Pank, The Florida Review, Fiction Southeast, and other publications. Email her (msheffi3@fau.edu) with all your advising questions.
Monday, November 10, 2014
Words Words Words Words!
A friend studying the
indigenous people of the Chiapas region in Mexico reports that in the Tzotzil
language there, the word for word is
the same as the word for struggle. Hmm.
What writer doesn’t struggle each day to unearth
the good word, the right word, the sculpted or edgy; tufted or twangling; the flawless gem to take
its place in the mosaic we see in our minds?
We trawl for the perfect verb. Scour horizons
for the dead-on noun. Beat our feet on the mud hoping the adjective we’ve been
stalking will bubble up from the goo. Bubble,
burble, bauble, bosh, scrim, scram, scrum, flapdoodle, flummoxed, umber,
ululate. Acres of choices, the misfits,
or almost fits so many, the perfect fits, so few.
“Word: (n.) …A
single distinct conceptual unit of language, comprising inflected and variant
forms.”
“Struggle :( n.)
…a determined effort under difficulties…a very difficult task.”
Difficult
indeed.
Is
our hero sizzled, soused, blotto or shickered?
Did he drink from
a flask, a flagon, or a stein?
Is he an oaf,
or a galoot?
In a
2013 New Yorker piece, the nonfiction stylist John
McPhee (In Suspect Terrain; Coming into
the Country) describes his system for finding “le mot juste,” that elusive word: “You draw a box not only around any word that
does not seem quite right but also around words that fulfill their assignment
but seem to present opportunity. While the word inside the box may be perfectly
O.K., there is likely to be an even better word for this situation, a word
right smack on the button, and why don’t you try to find such a word?” This is the crux of the struggle: The “better
word.” Scamper, scurry; scuttle, or scud?
McPhee warns against leaning on “the scattershot wad from a thesaurus.”
Go to the dictionary, instead, he advises (my own favorite, the Online Etymology Dictionary).
Indeed, words can be similar, synonymous, meaning
“having the same or nearly the same
meaning as another word.” The differences, however, can be epic. Each word, no
matter how small or remote, comes with its own root system, reaching down to
Latin or Old Norse, Middle English or Creole or Old German and more, tangles of
associations breathing life into how our word will resonate on the page. “Oaf,”
for example (this from the Online
Etymology Dictionary), dates from the 17th Century, “originally
‘a changeling; a foolish child left by the fairies’…from a Scandinavian source
such as Norwegian alfrr ‘silly person,” in old Norse “elft.” Hence, ‘a
misbegotten, deformed idiot.’”
“Galoot” (also from Online Etymology) means “‘awkward or boorish
man,’ 1812, nautical, ‘raw recruit, green hand,’ apparently originally a
sailor’s contemptuous word for soldiers or marines… Dictionary of American
Slang proposes galut, Sierra Leone Creole
form of galeoto, ‘galley slave.’”
Is the right-word struggle harder for
eco-writers than it is for others? Probably not. Unless you consider the eco-writer’s need to
wrestle with science and the habits of the natural world. In other words, we have to overthrow the
science, replacing it with the poetic. Again, from eco-poet McPhee, in Annals of the Former World:
“When the
climbers in 1953 planted their flags on the highest mountain, they set them in snow over the skeletons
of creatures that had lived in the warm clear ocean that India, moving north, blanked out. Possibly as much
as twenty thousand feet below the seafloor,
the skeletal remains had turned into rock. His one fact is a treatise in itself
on the movements of the surface of the earth.”
Not
a jot of science. Just words, boxes drawn around them, dictionaries consulted,
and the end, a journalistic flambé.
William Carlos Williams, in his opus
“Paterson,” has the last word on words:
“It is dangerous to leave written that which is badly written.
A chance word, upon paper, may
destroy the world. Watch carefully and erase, while the power is still yours, I
say to myself, for all that is
put down, once it escapes, may rot its way into a thousand minds, the corn becomes a black smut, and all
libraries, of necessity, be burned to the ground as a consequence.”
Corn
becomes a “black smut?” What is he talking about …? -- but wait. The second definition
of smut
is “a fungal disease of grains in which parts of
the ear change to black powder.”
Bejabbers!
Mary Ann Hogan received her MFA in Creative Nonfiction from
FAU in 2013. She currently teaches writing at Palm Beach State College, Boca
Raton campus. She is also nonfiction editor at Little Curlew Press. This blog post was originally published at Little Curlew Press.
Monday, November 3, 2014
Teaching Creative Writing to the Bad Writer You Used to Be
There’s an implicit, underlying question when you sit
down to design a creative writing course and ask what undergraduate writers
need. The true question: what did I need as an undergraduate writer? But
that doesn’t help.
We only have a semester after all.
In Rebecca McKay’s
“Teaching Creative Writing” course the other day, a few of us were toying with this
question: would you ever show a creative writing student what you wrote as an
undergraduate? Even thinking about it
now makes me feel cold. Let me tell you
about my undergraduate creative writing; every line of dialogue addressed
the individual to whom it was directed, like in a soap opera.
“John, how are we going
to get home?”
“I’m trying to figure
that out, Mary!”
“But John, we spent all
our money on that creative writing course with that underwhelming instructor.”
“Mary, don’t you think I know
that?!”
I too indulged in
plot-driven adventures of characters who were thin and attractive without ever
apparently needing to groom themselves or exercise, a practice indicative of
too much time spent reading fan fiction.
I occasionally participated in the overuse of adverbs (though
admittedly, the tendency has abated quite thoroughly). I think every MFA
student has scars from reading their old writing. To this day, I can’t write a character
description without chanting don’t overdo
it, no strange hair or eye color, no similes involving the landscape or the sky. So needless to say, that writing will stay in
the bottom of the box in my garage where it belongs (don’t even think about it,
we have a dog). It can be demoralizing,
but it’s also a reminder about how far I’ve come as a writer.
It’s unsettling to recall those days and then imagine
teaching a class of 24 writers of similar abilities (or even, shudder, less). Your old creative writing teachers go from
“cool” status all the way up to sainthood.
They endured you when you were still finding your voice, and they even
helped out along the way. They modeled
the habits of good writers that you needed to see. They were articulate and constantly reading,
in touch with their writing communities, and seemed to always have the perfect
way of summarizing or understanding a troublesome passage or piece. And when
their shoes look more like boats, it’s hard to imagine trying to fill them for
a class of undergraduates. I guess, as
Becka reminds us, the good part is that they won’t recognize our inadequacies.
They won’t notice that your knowledge of magical realism is sorely
lacking, or that you’re really more of a niche writer. If you can forgive the students their
improper conjunctions and be as ardent in helping them as your creative writing
teachers were in helping you, that’s all they’ll remember: your passion.
Maddy Miller has a full first name, but she would prefer if you didn't
know it. She got her BA from the
University of Utah, swears in her sleep, can fence a little, and her first kiss
belongs to a frog. She believes her
amphibious choice was probably better than most.
Monday, October 27, 2014
On Applying Oneself
So,
I graduated from FAU’s MFA program in the spring of 2012.
That last semester was full of applying to creative writing PhD programs (there
aren’t that many) specializing in creative
nonfiction (there are even fewer). After getting rejected from everywhere that
first round of applications, I had to do a lot of thinking.
One
thing I wish I knew when I was applying to PhD programs is the same thing I had
been told about submitting to journals all my writerly life—know where the hell you’re sending your work. For some reason
it didn’t transfer over to my frantic
lights-on/bar-closing-time pitches to any graduate school that had a program
that might be willing to take me. This approach resulted the aforementioned
smattering of rejections. After I had time to reflect on my rejections and
digest them properly, I actually researched some of these programs (like,
actually researched them for the first time) and was surprised to see
that the kinds of writing their faculty did and the kinds of writing their
alumni produced were nothing like the writing I was doing. This isn’t to say that their writing was better
or anything quantifiable like that, but it was different. And I
guess I wasn’t entirely surprised at that, but it
helped me get over the idea that the rejections were a matter of not being good
enough. This sort of thing isn’t a matter of good; it’s a matter of fit. And I found a place
where I fit, explained how I thought I would fit in my application, and saw my
first program acceptance the next year. The thing is, there are so few PhD
programs out there compared to journals that it might be wholly inaccurate to
say there’s
somewhere you and your work are suited for like you would when talking about
journal submissions. There might not be a program that suits your work. And
that’s
fine, but resist the urge to send your experimental hybrid work to a very
traditionalist program. And no, I'm not naming names.
The
worthwhileness of pursuing the creative writing PhD is, as with everything, a
matter of what you want to get out of it. I would say completely worth it in my
circumstances, as I would like to get some sort of tenure-track job one day,
but as you are reading this and no doubt already laughing, I say well fine, you’re right, I probably won’t get one of those. But I do get four
more years of what my MFA was—a time where someone is always telling
me to write, where I have a large writing project to complete, where I can get
eyes on my work, and where I am surrounded by talented artists from so many
different places. And I know that isn’t
something you need a PhD program for. You can find a community of writers
anywhere you happen to be. But there are some particulars about a PhD program
that are valuable to me: the rigor and expectations of a research degree, the requirement to not only produce creative work but also (in my particular program and dissertation) both a critical apparatus
and a section on pedagogy, the latter of which being a special focus of the
program I find myself in. This will hopefully make me more attractive to some
hypothetical hiring committee for a teaching job one day. And my English
department is operating under an “English
Studies” model, one where the various
sub-disciplines of English (Literature, Composition and Rhetoric, Creative
Writing, Pedagogy, and Linguistics) are represented and considered in an
interdisciplinary way. Taking a look at creative nonfiction through the lens of
a required linguistics seminar I took one semester offered me a somewhat unique
perspective on the field.
But
I guess I’ll find out how unique (or valued)
that perspective is when I find myself on the job market in two years. Those
are some applications I’ll be a little better about
researching for.
Mike
Shier holds an MFA in Creative Writing from Florida Atlantic University and is
currently in Illinois State University’s PhD program for
the same. Poems from Folie à Deux, a collaborative
poetry chapbook manuscript written collaboratively with Nicole Oquendo, have
appeared in Menacing Hedge and are forthcoming in Grist.
Monday, October 20, 2014
From the Archives…
A memory hit me out of the
blue recently, of my high school friend Oscar Fernandez. For a time, Oscar lived on the same street as
I did, and for a time we were close. I
had not spoken to, or even thought of, Oscar for years, but it suddenly occurred
to me that he was worth writing about. Oscar wanted to be a pilot, and after graduation he had gone to aeronautical
school in Florida. When he came home for
his first Christmas break – and here’s the story part – he was kidnapped.
Oscar’s family was Cuban. Though they may
have been wealthy in Havana, in Brookline, Massachusetts, in 1976, they were
not. His father worked as a carpenter; he,
his wife, and Oscar lived quietly and apparently harmoniously in a gray
clapboard apartment building at the end of our street. As I began writing the story, I remembered that
the ransom was set at $60,000, and that a relative was rumored to have some
connection with the kidnappers. Oscar was a diabetic, and after a day or two
without insulin he fell into a coma; the kidnappers got scared and dumped him
on the side of a Dorchester street. When
I saw him after he got out of the hospital, he had lost his eyesight and all of
his plans for the future, but he had found God. He wanted nothing to do with his old friends, including me.
When I started, my story was about a young
man friend profoundly transformed by calamity. I wanted to consider the importance of being with people you wouldn’t mind
spending your last moments with, because as Oscar came to know, the world can
end right now.
A little way into a first draft, I checked
the archives of the Boston Globe. I was
astonished to find how much of Oscar’s story I had forgotten over the decades. The kidnappers had come to the apartment.
Someone had called for help; when the police burst into the house they had, by
some horrible miscalculation, shot and killed Oscar’s father. As I read my memories returned, of standing
on the sidewalk as police cars crowded the street; of cutting Oscar’s senior picture
out of my yearbook to give to a reporter, and of the hole that remained; of learning
that he and his mother, who quickly moved away, got a big settlement from the
Brookline Police.
I came into the MFA program planning to
write memoir. I’m in my first nonfiction
class ever this semester, and I’m finding that wrestling with memory is way
more complicated than I expected. Talking
and reading about the ambiguities involved in telling ``the truth’’ is enormously helpful as I try
to reconstruct past events.
If I had written Oscar’s story without any
research, it would have captured something of my loss and its consequences, but
totally misstated the dimensions of his. I didn’t know Oscar’s father well; his
death had little impact on me in the long run. But memory changes when missing
facts are filled in. Even my
forgetfulness adds texture, in retrospect, to our relationship, to his decision
to jettison me as a friend. I may have been satisfied with whatever story I ended
up with had I not checked that archive, but I’m glad I did. I wonder what else I don’t know I don’t
know.
Hilde Hartnett Goldstein is working towards an MFA in
creative nonfiction.
Monday, October 13, 2014
The Thesis Process
I
am now in my third year of the MFA program at FAU, and during my time here I
have realized something definitive about my writing process: writing will always be painful. I used to imagine that once I settled into a
groove with writing, once I had a place in an MFA program and actually made
time to write every day, the act of writing would become easier. In fact, being fully invested in my writing
is still as difficult as ever. I am
hardly alone in this feeling; every writer must battle distractions,
procrastination, self-doubt, and the terror of the blank page. I know I am in good company. I also find that
the more agony I go through when writing a piece, the more positive feedback my
piece ultimately receives, so I try to work on embracing the pain.
But my third year has been my most challenging year
yet. During my first two years in the
program, it was necessary that I focus on learning how to teach and on the
classes I was taking in addition to my own creative writing. Now that I have finished my coursework and
feel more comfortable as a teacher, there is not much left to “distract” me
from my primary reason for being here:
the completion of my thesis, a collection of short stories. It isn’t enough to simply finish my thesis; I
feel that it should represent the very best that I can do. That added pressure, plus the larger amount
of unstructured time, has resulted in some writer’s block.
Setting regular deadlines can be helpful in ensuring that
work gets done, but I am realizing that if I want to do more than just complete
the work – if I want to do it well – there
will be times that I need to set one story aside in order to work on
another. The particular section of my
thesis that I’m most inspired to work on can change depending on the day, my
mood, or what I happen to be reading.
I’m learning that the more I can recognize this feeling of inspiration
and follow it, the quicker I can get past feeling stuck and the less painful
the writing process will be. I think
that this approach is one of the advantages of working with a short story
collection, which doesn’t require a strict chronology the way a novel might; I
have the freedom to shift my focus to whichever story appears most in focus. The process is less structured and less
linear than I thought it would be.
Instead of focusing on accomplishing a specific task, a good day is one
where I can simply remain invested and engaged in my work for as long as
possible.
Katrina Gersie is an MFA candidate in fiction at FAU.
She works as a GTA and as Editor-in-Chief of Coastlines. Her thesis is a
collection of realist short stories.
Monday, October 6, 2014
I'll Make This Quick
You’re busy – I’m busy, but we’ve both made time for
this conversation and no one’s economy of time is solvent enough to always
select something over nothing.
So I was asked “how does one maintain an art
practice when unreasonably busy?”
My reactionary answer is that one does
not. Cannot. I cannot. But this isn’t necessarily true. My more measured answer
is that one does not practice their craft in the same – or even similar –manner
when working too much or even working too little.
This distinction seems obvious once
articulated: if my pattern of behavior or my space is disturbed, then so will
my patterns of behavior in entering into my imaginative spaces.
Though the constant I see in myself as
well as in my busy maker-friends is that we select to make something over
nothing more often than not; to make something of the ache of inwardness (?) of
critical observation (?) of imaginative fits (?) of the simple need to be
making (?) – this is what drove us into this situation in the first place.
Here is the oversimplification of the
idea: I practice my craft when I’m too busy to practice my craft in the way I was,
just a moment ago, because I want (need?) to.
Within this busy machine, the object of
the craft or the manner of accessing it may be an oddity and the process will
most certainly have an unusual pace, but it’s clearly better than the
existential penalties of selecting nothing.
There are also novelties that will
likely occur from both the artificial slowness of this time-restricted process
as well as from the necessity to invent situational, compartmentalized methods
to access the practice.
If we agree for the moment that – in any
artistic endeavor – the process is the product, then we as makers would do well
to not only pay attention to the specifics of our process as a matter of course,
but also seek to disturb our habits of process to gain perspective on the
objects we create.
In short: if you write the first draft
of that 5,000 word piece of prose over the course of six weeks and in sessions
of no more than thirty minutes – that product will be different in significant
ways than if you wrote it over the course of two days at a frantic, obsessive
pace.
The benefits of this imposed brake upon
the process, for me, often results in new methods to access the specific work –
mostly because I cheat this restrictive system. I will find ways to return to
the work without falling behind in my other, time-consuming obligations. If I
can’t steal a thirty minute writing session, I’ll do some light research into
concepts or thematic elements I find the product preoccupied with while I eat
lunch at my desk. Or I’ll view or take photographs of images that remind me of
the world I’m building while I stand in line or move from one obligation to the
next. I become obsessed with the craft object not by working on it tirelessly, but
because my time economy forces me to move away from the work often and without
enough time in-session to reach satisfaction.
I think I might produce matured products
more efficiently when I’m too busy – which is the opposite of what the
narrative on art practices suggests.
Thanks for your time and feel free to
interrupt me if you’d like to continue this conversation.
Jake Henson received his MFA from
Florida Atlantic University in 2011. His thesis is a multi-modal collection of
fiction, creative nonfiction, & visual art. He has continued to work in and
experiment with the combination of language with a variety of forms such as
digital photography, stencil making, paper sculpture, artist books and screen
printing –in an effort to access the reading experience with an authenticity of
expression that resonates with audience.
He is happy to be back with the FAU community and is always interested
in collaborative projects.
Monday, September 29, 2014
How My MFA Helped Prepare Me to be a Writer
Back
when I was an MFA student at FAU, people outside of my school circles would
often express concern and confusion about what I was actually doing in grad
school.
“You’re
going to school to be a writer?” They’d ask, “So, why do you need a degree for
that? Can’t you just, like, write?”
I’d
explain to them that yeah, I could just write, but that writing was an art, a
serious discipline, and that I planned on having an actual career doing it and
that my time in grad school was preparing me for that. So many people
questioned my choice, however, that I’d sometimes have second thoughts too. I
never doubted the fact that grad school was teaching me to be a better writer, but
I did sometimes wonder if it truly was preparing me to enter the scary and
intimidating world of professional authors. You know, the part of being a
writer that’s more than just writing really cool stories.
Five
years out of the MFA program, I can now say that I finally have a definitive
answer, and it’s positive. Yes, my MFA really did prepare me for a career as a
professional writer, and it did so in a lot of unexpected ways.
Most
importantly, the MFA program instilled in me a sense that writing is a
discipline. You have to sit your butt down and write and write a lot and you
can’t continually start projects and leave them unfinished, which was a big
problem I’d had before college. When you have an assignment due Tuesday night
in class you can’t sit around and wait for the muse to magically inspire you.
You have to bang it out and come up with an ending or at least an ending place,
regardless of your feelings about it. Same goes for writing as a career.
Professional writers have assignments due too and editors aren’t interested in
your level of divine inspiration. They want you to produce quality writing on
time. The MFA program taught me not to be a flake, and now when I have a job to
do, I know I can get it done no matter what because I’m relying on skill,
experience, structure and honestly, you could even call it willpower.
Professional
writers work with other people constantly: editors, agents, publishers,
marketing departments and freelance clients. Most traditionally published
writing is the result of a collaborative effort between many other people
besides simply the writer, and writers need to be able to listen to someone
else’s ideas (and yes, critiques) of their work. Guess what prepared me for
this aspect of my writing career? Workshops! Group Projects! I used to get really nervous before workshop
because I never knew what my classmates and professors were going to say about
my stories and poems, but after three years of workshopping I grew a thicker hide
and learned that criticism of my writing wasn’t a criticism of me. This has
helped me enormously in my real-world writing career. I don’t fall apart when
an editor wants changes or if something I submitted gets rejected repeatedly.
I’ve learned to listen to other people’s visions for my writing and to be open
to new ideas.
I
recently began working with a literary agent, which was an exciting but also
kind of scary new prospect. Suddenly,
much more was required of me. I was working on timelines, submission packages,
proposals, synopses. I was taking notes, researching new topics. I was even
asked to discuss (in detail) the work of other authors. I have new assignments
almost every night, and at one point I casually remarked that it was like being
in grad school all over again (which I totally meant as a good thing because my
MFA years were the best time of my life, for real). Then I realized, wow, it
was exactly like being in school
again because I wasn’t being asked to do a single thing I hadn’t already done
at FAU many times before. This was a pretty big revelation for me. My MFA
really had prepared me for the life
of a professional writer and because of that I’m confident and secure and ready
to kick butt in the publishing world with the best of them.
Victoria Fedden graduated from the
MFA program in 2009. She is a stay at home mom living in Fort Lauderdale and is
the author of the memoirs Amateur Night
at the Bubblegum Kittikat and Sun
Shower: Magic, Forgiveness and How I Learned to Bloom Where I Was Planted.
Her work has appeared in the Huffington
Post, the Sun Sentinel, Real Simple, Chicken Soup for the Soul and the recent anthology My Other Ex: Women's True Stories of Leaving
and Losing Friends.
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